How to cultivate powerful (and practical!) self-belief.
What does self-belief mean when the rubber hits the road?
You hear it all the time. “You’ve got to believe in yourself.” But what does it actually mean?
Like, I used to believe in the Easter Bunny. Am I supposed to believe in myself in the same way?
“Despite what everyone says, I am convinced that I exist.”
I’m fairly confident that’s not what we’re talking about.
(Every time you say that you don’t believe in fairies, a little Dymphna dies.)
What we are talking about is a belief in our capabilities. But not in a general way. In a specific way – relative to the challenges before us.
So it’s not “I believe I can do anything.” You can’t. You can’t fly. You can’t breathe underwater. Your delusional if you think you can.
But you can do many specific and wonderful things. And so self-belief must be placed in a practical context: “I believe I can overcome the challenges I face.”
And so notice that it’s not all about you. It’s about your journey too.
Think about it this way. You come across a mountain and it’s in your road.
Now you might think, “I can’t climb this mountain.”
And that might be right. That might be an accurate assessment of your capabilities. Self-belief has to be grounded in reality, otherwise you’re just deluding yourself.
So you might think that you can’t climb the mountain, and you might be right.
But that’s not your challenge. You challenge is just to get to the other side of the mountain… somehow.
Maybe you charter a plane and fly over. May you find a walkable pass through. Maybe you find a clan of dwarves who can build you a tunnel.
(Don’t laugh. Every time you laugh at magical dwarves, one of them dies.)
Self-belief in this instance is the belief that there is a solution to the challenge you face and that
1. You can find it; and
2. You can do it.
Do you see what I mean? Self-belief is contextual. It’s nice in a general sense, but as a tool, it’s most powerful in particular applications.
And in that sense, it’s an extension of the abundance mindset.
In the abundance mindset, every problem has a solution, and the tools, resources and help you need are or will be available to you.
No problem is ever final. No challenge is ever fatal.
And so if you are cultivating self-belief (and as everyone says, it’s essential), you need to be doing this in the context of abundance.
You have to. It won’t work without it. Like, take an affirmation that says:
“I believe in myself. I can handle whatever challenge this miserable and nasty universe throws at me. In a world where it is pretty much impossible to achieve anything because people are turds and God hates us all anyway, I will achieve great things.”
How much sense does that make?
Self-belief must be relative to your journey. And so to believe in yourself is to believe in your journey.
“I am on a road where I will be tested, challenged and pushed to my limits. But there will always be a way, and I will grow and achieve great things.”
When the rubber hits the road, belief in yourself and belief in your journey are one and the same.
And abundance is the key to it all.