Truth Bomb Tuesday: Had a gutful? That says a lot.
How do you make space for everything you need to get done? How do you make space for the new version of you to come through?
There’s a school of thought – and this might not be for everyone so try it on and see what you think – there’s a school of thought that says that this is the wrong way to think about it.
Your job isn’t to make room for the new you.
Your job is to invite the new you in, and force the old you out.
This is similar to that dieting idea – it’s not about eating less cake – which requires will-power and determination and is really hard. It’s about eating so many carrots that you don’t have space for cake any more.
Fill your meal plan with so much healthy, that the bad foods get forced out.
The awkward reality is that ‘enabling’ ourselves is hard. We might think, “I’ll do some self-study, or sort out my taxes, or do some research on a new investment strategy – I’ll do some of this good stuff after I’ve made some space for it in my life.”
But life has a way of filling your schedule and making sure that never happens. Life hates a vacuum. And to make sure there’s enough time and energy left at the end of the day to do these new things for yourself – that takes real commitment and discipline.
Some days you do it. You might even do it for a few days in a row. But then something happens, and the steps you need to take towards your better you get squeezed out of your schedule.
And so you need to put first things first. If you decide you need to study an hour a day to achieve your goals, then do that first.
You might be thinking, “How am I going to do that? My life is full to the brim already.”
But that’s actually kinda the point. It won’t fit. Something needs to give.
The only question is what gives.
What do you find you no longer have time for? What are you suddenly no longer willing to put up with? What are you suddenly completely allergic to?
Often these are things that needed to be culled from your life anyway.
I mean, you might spend more time studying, and then when the kids leave you a pile of dishes that’s going to take 20 precious minutes to clean up, you might suddenly decide that you’re not putting up with that any more. You literally don’t have time for it.
You crack the whip and get the kids to clean up their own damn dishes.
Or you might fill your days with positive affirmations of self-worth. Then you notice you’re friend wants to come round and complain and undermine your dreams.
You don’t have time for that any more. You tell her pick up her act or ship out.
You get the point.
Making space for what you want first is hard. It puts you under pressure.
But once you’re under that pressure, you then become very intolerant to the things that no longer serve you.
You just don’t have time for that nonsense anymore.
And that is just the kick in the pants you need.
So this is the discipline. Put first things first. Take on that pressure for a while. And then notice what you’re just not willing to put up with anymore.
And then, of course, stop putting up with it.